Escape Attempt.

[onlyforthedream]

It's been over a week since I woke up in the clinic on this island, and I haven't set a single foot out of doors. Well, that ends tonight. I like to think I'm a patient man, or that at least I have the ability to be one, but it's really gone on long enough. It takes a minute of standing to get my legs under me, really under me. I'm creaky after being bedridden so long, but after a few steps across the floor, I feel practically limber again. Reaching for the scrubs is painful, sure, but I've felt worse. I pull them on, as silently as I may and more gingerly than I'd like, and move back to my now vacant bed. I bunch the sheets tellingly over each other and ride them up the pillow, just in case one of the doctors pokes their head in for a cursory glance. Anything more will reveal my absence, but then, I'll be gone so there won't be much they can do.

I'm not trying to set off for anywhere in particular, anyhow, although I would like to look at the ocean at night. I just need to breathe fresh air. I pause by the door, crouching a little and ducking out of the light cast from the hallway. Someone wanders past in the direction of the kitchen. I wait a few moments, then step out into the hall, straightening up and walking with a nonchalant ease-

The wrong direction, apparently. I arrive at a door that opens into a room with a jukebox, a pool table, some sofas and a bookshelf and a piano, but no door that leads outside. It's late enough that it's largely empty, some people on the far side of the room passing a news reel between them and talking. Not wishing to draw attention or interrupt, I back out of the room on silent footfalls to try the opposite end of the hall, turning back the way I came.

Comments

[onlyapassenger]

"Stark didn't keep his job for long after your alleged death," Bucky starts, and in this, he's more comfortable than reciting another man's words. He's used to giving reports, used to condensing information to the barest essentials, and that his own part in this story is mercifully brief, there's no underlying hesitation. He's matter of fact. Direct.

"There was an incident with the Skrulls: a global, long term secret invasion in which they infiltrated every organization. Starktech was compromised, which meant Stark himself was compromised. This allowed for Norman Osborn to worm his way into power; his involvement in the final battle against the Skrull Queen was critical to our victory. The President recognized this, and through a questionable leap in logic, made him the Director of S.H.I.E.L.D., which Osborn promptly dismantled, and renamed H.A.M.M.E.R. While popular with the public, Osborn didn't receive the same warm welcome from the people he was persecuting. Adopting the persona Iron Patriot, he led his own team of Avengers against us a number of times before laying siege to Asgard. You were resurrected, for lack of a better word, shortly before this, and as Captain America led the real Avengers against Osborn and his cronies. Once his insanity was revealed to the world at large, you were asked by the President to step in, and clean up the mess that Stark and Osborn left behind. The Act was thrown out, and the Avengers were restructured into a number of different teams, each serving their own purpose."

[onlyforthedream.livejournal.com]

A lot can happen in a year. I'll need time to digest that, to really turn it over in my head. What's most daunting is the sum total of what Bucky must be leaving out.

"God," I say quietly.

[onlyapassenger]

"Makes you miss the War, doesn't it?" says Bucky, the sentiment absolutely sincere for all that his tone's wry. In reality, it was no less complicated, he supposes, but they were in their own time, then, starting on solid footing.

[onlyforthedream.livejournal.com]

"It does. Is that terrible to say?" I murmur, running my hand over the back of my neck and leaving it there, head bowed.

[onlyapassenger]

"I'm in no position to judge," says Bucky, unconsciously mimicking Steve's posture when he runs a hand back over his own head, coming to a rest on his neck. That he still considers the War the good old days himself removes any sort of objectivity he might have had, after all; it probably is terrible when it comes right down to it, but while Bucky's adapted well enough to the modern age, that doesn't mean he feels all that comfortable there.

[onlyforthedream.livejournal.com]

"What a waste," I mutter, still wishing for that gratitude, that relief. It doesn't come. All I see is Bill Foster's wasted body, being lowered into a hole by a crane. Everything both sides went through and it took a Skrull invasion and an attack on the realm of the gods to get the thing overturned. The people who wanted it put into place undid it themselves with shortsightedness and ego, which is almost always the way of things, but even knowing that...

My head aches with the sudden onslaught of scenarios I can't help but run. if I was even half decent company before, this officially marks the end of it.

[onlyapassenger]

"You don't know the half of it," says Bucky, equally as quiet, and he moves to stand. He came into the conflict as an outsider; while he lived through the chaos he's merely describing to Steve, he can't help but think that it affects his old partner more than himself. True, Bucky started to establish himself in the existing order before he arrived on this island, but there's a history with most of these people he's lacking, for all that he likes them well enough (even Clint Barton, frustrating a bastard as that man can be).

"But I think I've said enough for tonight."

[onlyforthedream.livejournal.com]

I don't respond for a minute. The weight of this new information is unexpected. It shouldn't be, maybe, but it is. I don't move from where I'm seated, elbows on my knees, one hand folded into the other, gaze locked ostensibly on the floor but in actuality untold miles away.

"Good night, Bucky."