if you can hold on, hold on

[onlyforthedream]

This isn't a scene I ever wanted to witness.

The run to the Compound was brutal, and Tony was on his way out to get Xavier when I was on my way in. At some point, I took the Shield off my back and set it on an unoccupied bed.

There are doctors moving deftly from the table Bucky's stretched out on to the sink, or trays of gauze and utensils and back again. I didn't let anyone get near the arm until Dr. McCoy was there. I know the kind of technology he's worked with. He removed it, and I felt something wrench in my gut. I was vaguely aware of someone at my elbow speaking with concern before I shrugged them off and went around to watch them peel away the Winter Soldier's uniform. It would take a soldering iron to cut through it. He's covered in superficial wounds- severe bruising, mostly, damage to his ribs. With the arm gone, they manage all right.

Oh, God, Bucky.

I beg off questions, agree to let McCoy take care of the knife wound in my side after another reprimand I barely register. I'm numb to it, whatever he's doing. I don't bring up the gash on my leg. There's enough blood and dirt that I can't imagine anyone noticing for a while, anyway.

"...you'll want to restrain him," I say, as the thought occurs, though the words are hard to get out. I catch Rory frowning in my peripheral vision, bagging the ruined and blood soaked t-shirt I'd been wearing before depositing it in the trash.

"Just- until-"

There's a sound in the hallway of heavy metal on flooring and I'm up, off the spare bed, ignoring Dr. McCoy's curse of frustration.

"Professor?"

Comments

[onlyforthedream]

I don't move an inch, a muscle in my jaw jumping as I grind my molars together.

"I swear to God, Stark-"

[thebettermen]

"Enough," says Charles, striding towards the pair of them before a proper brawl breaks out. This situation has already gotten wildly out of hand without more violence, and they only have so many tables. Staring up at the Captain, keenly aware of their difference in size, he stays his ground.

"Steve, I give you my word that we will take every precaution to save your friend, but you cannot expect us to do our best work with you antagonizing us every step of the way. For his sake, I'm asking you, please..." Despite his better judgment, Charles reaches out for the man's arm. "Leave peacefully."

[onlyforthedream]

He's right, of course. I'm not making anything better. I'm not helping.

And if you're not a help, you're a hindrance.

My gaze drops, flickers. For the first time in a while, I focus on my breathing, make myself calm down. With barely a nod I turn, and start for the door.

[leftwithmybones]

McCoy lets out the breath that he'd been holding in, braced for some kind of catastrophe. He shoots Charles a relieved, gracious look and holds up the vial that's ready to be delivered. "Well, if anything's going to do it, this is as close as it's getting," he says, taking a look at the device Stark's gussied up for him. "Everyone ready?"

[notawastedlife]

"You got this? You got this," Tony said, looking between McCoy and Xavier, pulling the helmet back off. "I'm going to make sure he doesn't... break anything, back in a moment if we have to recalibrate."

[onlyforthedream]

I'm halfway out the door when I sense someone following me and stop short, turn back to find Iron Man at my heels, and frown. Not angrily.

"Where are you going?"

[notawastedlife]

"Stopping you from breaking your hand," Tony said, entirely pleasantly. "Or... breaking whatever you're about to punch, I couldn't say which it'll be. They have the gadget, they don't need me right now."

[onlyforthedream]

We may not see eye to eye, we may never like each other, but that doesn't mean I don't know the man's a genius. God knows what the Soviets pulled. Having someone in the room who can improvise like Tony can, when he's aware of the fact that his expertise is not necessarily the most valuable for the situation- I'm not an idiot, and I'm not spiteful. He needs to be here.

"No," I say firmly, quietly. "There's no need. I want you in there."

[notawastedlife]

Tony considered this. He seemed calmer, and really, Tony didn't know what he would have done. He wasn't really the psych guy, and the psych guy was kind of occupied.

"...okay," he said. It wasn't an order, clearly, but a request. And having been in something like that chair, with Pepper, he would have made it of whoever he'd thought should be in there. Whatever increased the chances. "Don't punch anything you can't replace. I'm going to be... in there."

[onlyforthedream]

It's not a conscious decision, reaching out to catch his arm, the weight and feel of the gauntlet familiar for all that I haven't had much contact, really, with this suit.

"Please," I say quietly. He knows I'm asking, but now I've actually asked.

"Just... do what you can."